Borough Market was subpar at best, but I will right the blog post anyway

The Borough Market was alright. I didn’t really do much while I was there, and it was really packed. So packed that I wasn’t even able to cross the street. There was nowhere to sit, and all seats that were opened were for restaurants; and no matter how bankrupt they were, they’d rather die than let me sit for 10 minutes. I ate a meat pie, and it had nothing to do with Sweeney Todd. The presentation was less than phenomenal. It started in the fridge, and then they pulled it out, and then they put it in the microwave, and finally they put it into a box. The fork was wooden and I hated that, wood does not belong in my mouth. The pie was alright, but holy shit were the strawberries I had afterwards. I have never had strawberries so ripe in my entire life. It was like making love for the first time, and they were covered in chocolate! I will never have another strawberry as good as that one (except for the ones I had today). That was kinda all that I did at the market.

MINI GOLF! I went mini golfing and it was fucking awesome! Nine amazing holes of pure passion with some of the most interesting designs that I have ever seen. One of the holes was a fully functioning pinball machine, and another one was a massive ramp into a castle. There were also little secrets you could find and hit in order to get points removed from your score. I had a blast there and it was easily my favorite part of the day. 10/10 mini golfing experience. I wish we had good mini golf courses in Arkansas because I can only hit my ball up a small, green hill so many times before I want to die. Father, if you are reading this, lets go mini golfing in DC soon.

I would add photos, but the internet won’t allow it. If you would like to see photos, please just text and ask. Thank you.